With Love, Meghan Episode Eleven: Easy as Pie

WITH LOVE, MEGHAN: EASY AS PIE

Original Airdate: August 26, 2025

Special Guest: Tan France

Mentions of "Joy": 2

Mentions of Edible Flower Sprinkles: Yes

Passive-Aggressive Moments: 1

Gushing Praise for Markle: "All right, yeah. I'm envious of your life".

Her Royal Highness Meghan, Duchess of Sussex finally has the perfect accessory that every wealthy liberal woman needs: a sassy gay sidekick to trade quips and quiche with. Easy as Pie showcases our dynamic duo doing what they do best. For one, it is sweetly delivered snark. For the other, it is sweetly delivered insincerity. Fortunately, Easy as Pie lets them swap places with abandon.  

What is France known for? The wines? The croissants? Being a nation of cheese-eating surrender monkeys? They are, I doubt, known for their tans. That is until now, when the Hostess with the Mostess welcomes one of the hosts of Netflix's Queer Eye for a full day of fun and frolics. Meghan is excited that fashion expert Tan France is stopping by her rented Montecito home/studio. She stops at a bookstore before his arrival to pick up some items for Mr. and Mr. France's children, Isaac and Ismael. "Half of the joy of the gift is the presentation", the Duchess gushes as she instructs us on how to wrap these gifts of love.

I pause at this moment to marvel at how Mr. and Mr. France came to choose these two Biblical names for the sons that they are raising. Ismael and Isaac were, according to the Old Testament, half-brothers. Ismael, the older one, was the son of Abraham and his maidservant Hagar, whom Islamists claim descendance from. The younger son, Isaac, was the son of Abraham and his wife Sarah, who is one of the Jewish patriarchs and listed among Jesus' ancestors via his foster father Joseph. The conflict between Ismael and Isaac is the metaphorical genesis of the Arab/Israeli conflict. Mr. and Mr. France even got the birth order right, with Ismael being the older of the two. I find the selected names Ismael and Isaac France to be, well, interesting on many levels. Yet, I digress.

Well, with "fashion expert and television host" France finally arriving, said fun and frolics can begin. First, a little lavender grey latte. "Doesn't it just sound chic?", the Duchess shares with the world's foremost gay Muslim. Tan takes to his surroundings like a pink duck to water. "I'm going to take this off", he says, referring to the sweater hanging about him. He begins removing it. "Are you...let me put it somewhere", Meghan says. Tossing caution and his sweater to the wind, Tan just throws it out to the With Love, Meghan crew. Looking a bit befuddled if not downright astonished, the Duchess of Sussex seems as thrown off as Tan France's sweater by his antics. "Fabulous! Make yourself at home. I love it!" she declares. 

I am not convinced that Meghan Markle did indeed love it.

As they prepare the lattes and coconut French toast, Meghan cannot resist adding her favorite condiment to the dish. "What was that that you just added?", France asks. Somewhat sheepishly, Meghan squeals, "Flower sprinkles. I love them". Now it is France's turn to be befuddled if not downright astonished. "Wow", he says, slightly blank-faced. "That's the gayest (bleep) I've seen in a long time".

This cooking done, they head off to the craft barn. Here, they will make aprons for their children to wear when they make their own crafts. As they design them, France rejects a rainbow for the apron. "Too gay, too on-the-nose", he says. 

It's back to the kitchen for some pie baking. We learn from Mr. France that Mr. France prepares for the spicy food Mr. France makes for Mr. France with Tums. As part of the pie preparations, Meghan tells us, "We're going to make a little slurry. My friend Vicky taught me that word". Dear God but does this woman still go on about that. 

As a side note, perhaps my hearing is off. However, judging from the audio in Easy as Pie, it sounds as if that "slurry" quip was added in post-production. It does not sound as if it was recorded during the actual taping. It just sounds different. My less generous side thinks that Meghan Mountbatten-Windsor just wants to make another dig at Vicky Tsai.  

We learn the separate love stories of Mr. and Mrs. Sussex and Mr. and Mr. France. We also learn that Meghan Markle's musical tastes are quite suburban. 

"Honestly, one of the things that I miss most about the UK is the radio station called Magic", she says. "Magic FM? Wow!", our out Pride of Doncaster says. "Now, I'm sorry to say this to you, uh, publicly, but that's such a grandma station". Meghan is taken slightly aback for a second time. To showcase her pride in Mom Rock, she plugs in Lisa Stanfield's All Around the World courtesy of Mom Jeans on Sirius XM. We have a flashback to My Guide to Furoshiki Wrapping. This Japanese method of gift wrapping will come in handy for yet another gift that Meghan will give to Tan. It is a masala dabba that Meghan bought "a year or so ago" and was waiting for the perfect opportunity and recipient to bestow upon. At last, she has found the best gay British Pakistani for this treasure. The former Tamveer Safdar is overwhelmed with his masala dabba. "That actually has given me goosebumps. That is so beautiful. I will pass this down to my children. That's how beautiful that is", he informs us all.

Muhammad Ali Jinnah was less emotional when Pakistan was formally established than Tamveer Safdar was on receiving this royal gift. I do not know anyone who ever got so excited about being given a regifted item as Tan France. Now, with the day closing, these two new BFFs can enjoy a lovely California sunset. 

Easy as Pie is my first encounter with Tan France. I did watch the original Queer Eye for the Straight Guy but have never delved into the revamped version. Easy as Pie does not make me yearn for more adventures with the Fab Five Remix. 

Despite that, I did end up liking Tan France. I genuinely could not tell if he was sincere or not with his enthusiasm to be with Meghan. He certainly had no issue being pleasantly insulting to the Duchess of Sussex. France did not care where his sweater went. Seeing Meghan look a bit put off by him not waiting for so much as a hanger made me smile. His ability to kindly insult her was a highlight of Easy as Pie. Past guests may have been perplexed to leery about the Duchess' flower sprinkle fixation. France was pretty much openly dismissive of it.  

France has a soft, soothing voice, perfect for children's bedtime stories. I doubt that he will read the Book of Genesis to Ismael and Isaac though. What I liked about France was how he was unafraid to throw shade at the Duchess. He throws his sweater to the crew (or on the floor). I imagine that this would make the meticulous Meghan Markle mad. France is oblivious at minimum. He openly mocks her love for edible flower sprinkles. He ridicules her tastes in music. Granted, he uses "gay" as a slight pejorative. I suppose that he can get away with it. I do not think it is appropriate even for a gay man to use "gay" as a negative descriptive, but there it is.

Tan France may have mocked Meghan, Duchess of Sussex. However, the executive producer of With Love, Meghan did something in Easy as Pie that I do not remember her doing for any previous guest. She had a post-credit scene for him. We saw France create a little face mask out of green tea and Greek yogurt. The less charitable side of me thinks that Markle included this to show him dab this concoction on one side of his face. Perhaps she thought he looked idiotic. I cannot say if that was the intention. Perhaps the audience was given the ingredients for this face mask via the QR code. Frankly, I would be astonished if anyone actually wanted to smear green tea and Greek yogurt on their face.

Easy as Pie at 38 minutes is the longest With Love, Meghan episode of the second batch. The viewer feels every bit of it. I put it down in part to having so much thrown at us. We have the book gift wrapping. We have the embossing devices that she will give France for a France family project. We have the latte and French toast making. We have the apron making, which is another take-home project. We have the pie making. We have the masala dabba presentation. We have the concluding sunset beach visit.

I have, with some justification, been accused of planning too much when I travel with family and friends. However, Markle's myriad of arts and crafts projects would overwhelm any sane person. France may have gushed over Markle's generosity. I am not convinced though that either Mr. France or Mr. France will ever emboss the books that Mrs. Sussex presented to them. 

Easy as Pie makes the case that Meghan Markle Saxe-Coburg & Gotha is pretty much a loon. She is so desperate to present this warm, affable, cheerful facade. She has that endless Carolina shag music that is always aiming to present a casual vibe, but which tries too hard to do so. A lot of what she says attempts to sound so sugary-sweet and joyful. Defending her trademark edible flower sprinkles, she says, "I really like things to look beautiful". Later on, during the pie making, she again defends her culinary choices. "It's not going to make it taste bad", she says. "It's going to make it tasted loved".

The last time someone went on this much about love was when Mr. Burns was still high on his age-defying injections and Springfield mistook him for an alien. 

I once compared Meghan Sussex with Election's Tracy Flick. Easy as Pie made me see her as another fictional character. Here, she reminded me of Dolores Umbridge. Easy as Pie and With Love, Meghan in general always attempts to showcase the Duchess of Sussex as a wise teacher who wants only to bring elegance and yes, joy, into people's lives. There is the incessantly upbeat music, always trying to create a cheerful, relaxed atmosphere. There is Markle's efforts to sound delightful, full of shout-outs to "love" and "joy". There is her gushing towards her guests, almost always presenting gifts and other "tokens of love" to her guests.

Underneath all that upbeat veneer though, one senses that Meghan Markle just doesn't like people. A surprisingly revelatory moment is when she waxes rhapsodic about Magic FM. This tidbit, along with her love of soft rock, I'm sure was meant to make her endearing and relatable. What did surprise me as I watched Easy as Pie was that she called Magic FM "one of the things I miss most about the UK". 

It made me wonder if she missed her in-laws. Does she miss her brother-in-law and his wife, the future King and Queen? Does she miss her father and stepmother-in-law, the current King and Queen? Does she miss her nephews and niece, whom she has not seen in five years? Does she miss the British people whom she had pledged to serve as a working Royal? Does she miss the British countryside or the many palaces and royal lodges scattered about? Does she miss the nation as a whole? 

She does not seem to miss her estranged father, Thomas Markle. Yet I again digress.

Yes, she said that Magic FM was "one of the things I miss most about the UK". Maybe she does genuinely miss King Charles III and Queen Camilla, or TRH William, Prince of Wales and Catherine, Princess of Wales. She might even miss Anne, Princess Royal. However, my sense is that she does not.

Easy as Pie keeps to one With Love, Meghan tradition. That tradition is in having the guests go on about how wonderful the Duchess of Sussex is. "No, you've really inspired me. I'm not just saying that", France tells her as they prepare this rather elaborate breakfast for their children. I think the qualifier there suggests that he is just saying that. Seeing this grown man come close to tears at receiving the rather beat-up masala dabba and declaring it will become a France family heirloom is a sight. 

I've wandered a bit to say that Tan France is one of With Love, Meghan's better guests because he throws so much shade at the Duchess. Even things that may not have been intended as shade somehow come across as such.   

If there is one thing that Mrs. Sussex and Mr. France share, it is how they throw their respective spouses under the bus. Meghan calls Mr. Sussex "my husband" twice. I do not think that she has ever called him "Harry" on With Love, Meghan. Sometimes she'll say "Aitch" as in the first letter of his name. She seems to treat the word "Harry" like some voodoo curse that cannot be spoken. It is not as if we do not know who her husband is. Curiously, Tan does the same thing. He never said "Rob". He too would say "my husband". Worse, Tan basically stated that "my husband" does nothing but bake bread and needs Tums to get through Tan's Indian dishes. It is almost to where one wonders if those aprons would have been for Rob France rather than Ismael and Isaac France.

I still cannot believe that people would name their children after the biggest pair of sibling rivalry in all Scripture. Well, perhaps Jacob and Esau are bigger, but I digress.

Easy as Pie puts the Duchess of Sussex as she wishes to be seen. She wishes to be seen as an instructor, guiding people into lives of elegance and joy. She wishes to be seen as friendly, warm and welcoming. She wishes to be seen as a winner (Tan telling her that her aprons "won" because of her calligraphy).  Having her new sassy gay BFF throw a few barbs at her does make Easy as Pie more enjoyable to watch. 

There is simply no way to get through any With Love, Meghan episode without massive qualities of booze. Easy as Pie shows that it takes a Queer Eye to endure this royal Hostess with the Mostess. 

Tan France has the right idea. 

3/10