Summer Under the Stars 2024: Some Thoughts

 

Cary Grant and Katharine Hepburn again?

One wonders why 2024's Turner Classic Movies Summer Under the Stars series decided to dive yet again into the filmographies of people who have been featured ten times already. I figure that Grant, Hepburn, Bette Davis (now on her eighth SUTS presentation) and John Wayne (on his ninth) have a wide variety of films in their long careers. However, there must be actors who have either never been featured or who have not been featured as often as figures like Grant or Hepburn.

Out of the 31 performers for this year's Summer Under the Stars, there are some who have a surprisingly small number of appearances in TCM's annual August extravaganza. I was surprised to find that William Powell, who kicks off the month, is only on his third appearance, as are Montgomery Clift, Jean Harlow, Fred MacMurray and Joseph Cotten. Ida Lupino, Anne Bancroft, Jane Russell, John Gilbert, Jeanne Crain, Donna Reed, Marlene Dietrich and Tony Curtis are making only their second appearances in SUTS. Apart from Gilbert, whose heyday was in the silent film era, I am surprised that the others are barely coming back for a second time. 

They could not have substituted one of Cary Grant or Katharine Hepburn's years for a day of Tony Curtis or Jane Russell?

We are getting an astonishing 13(!) debuts for this year's Summer Under the Stars. Julie Andrews and Meryl Streep, who are among those making their debuts, are the only living performers featured this year. The other newcomers are Gordon MacRae, Peter Ustinov, Anita Page, Jean-Paul Belmondo, Jerry Lewis, Jose Ferrer, Robert Shaw, Ossie Davis and Leo Gorcey.

Gorcey's inclusion is a big surprise, as he was never a major star. He is mostly known as one of the Bowery Boys, which was a B-picture series. Like Gilbert, Anita Page will have mostly silent films for her day. Belmondo, I figure, will be this year's foreign film performer. Davis is the African American performer, and I think Ferrer will take up the Hispanic slot. I say "think" because Ferrer, despite being proudly Puerto Rican and the first Hispanic to win an acting Oscar, was rarely if ever featured as a Hispanic. 

You may have noticed that I said there would be thirteen debuts but mentioned only eleven actors. It is because two performers who are making their Summer Under the Stars debuts took me by surprise. 

I am not too surprised that Grace Kelly is on her very first journey through SUTS. Her filmography is smaller than most due to her marriage to Prince Rainer of Monaco, consisting of only eleven films overall not counting three documentaries where she appears as herself. Curiously, one of those films, The Wedding in Monaco, will be part of Princess Grace's SUTS day but not The Children of Theater Street where she appears on-camera and narrates. I would consider an Oscar-nominated documentary feature slightly more interesting to watch than a documentary short about Her Serene Highness' nuptials.

The big surprise is on the last debuting Summer Under the Stars player. I still cannot believe that this will be the first year Eleanor Powell will have a day dedicated to her. Not only is this Powell's first Summer Under the Stars, but it is the very first time Powell has been the focus of anything on TCM. In the thirty years of Turner Classic Movies, Eleanor Powell has not only not been a Summer Under the Stars player but not even been a Star of the Month!

I am absolutely astonished to read that. I am sure that we could have skipped one more romp through Bringing Up Baby for one of those Broadway Melody dance numbers. 

That leads to another longtime complaint on Summer Under the Stars. I do not get why we get many of the same films we have had before. Why not, for example, feature Kiss Them for Me for Cary Grant? Throw in Love Affair for Katharine Hepburn. I'd love to see TCM show the original Dune for Jose Ferrer, if only for the shift towards more contemporary or at least eccentric programming. Show Marlene, the 1984 documentary directed by Maximilian Schell for Dietrich's day. I think one year for Katharine Hepburn, TCM broadcast Katharine Hepburn: All About Me, and another time, the Vivien Leigh documentary Scarlett and Beyond was shown for either Summer Under the Stars or her Star of the Month programming, so what is to prevent TCM from featuring Marlene? 

As a side note, has Maximilian Schell ever been a Summer Under the Stars player? He could fit into programming. Alas, TCM waited until Jean-Paul Belmondo was dead before bothering to bring him in. He died in 2021, meaning that there were many years when he could have been saluted during his lifetime. I am sure that we could have skipped a Cary Grant year to show 24 hours of Belmondo. Diane Baker is still very much alive, but we won't be seeing her because we need to see Bette Davis in The Letter once again. Anthony Hopkins could have films from The Lion in Winter to The Father featured, but we'd be lucky to have the former shown for Katharine Hepburn's day. 

I get that there may be issues with broadcast rights and costs. However, I would like to see some of the lesser-known or later works from some of the featured players. Peter Ustinov's final film was 2003's Luther, yet 1982's Evil Under the Sun will be the one to show him in the latter part of his career. You could make a whole programming around his various turns as Hercule Poirot, but instead of featuring Death on the Nile, you opt for Evil Under the Sun? 

That at least makes some sense for Ustinov was the lead in that. How one can rationalize screening Around the World in 80 Days for Marlene Dietrich when she makes a cameo in it, I simply cannot guess at. If that is the case, TCM might as well show The Great Muppet Caper for Peter Ustinov since he made a cameo in there too. 

Turner Classic Movies could have taken the chance to honor Glynis Johns, Janet Paige and/or Donald Sutherland by letting them have a day of Summer Under the Stars programming. Anyone arguing that it would be impossible due to scheduling issues has forgotten how when Olivia de Havilland died on July 26, 2020, shortly after turning 104, she was fitted into that year's Summer Under the Stars scheduling. Curiously, she took the day reserved for Bette Davis, which if not for this last-minute substitution would have given Davis nine Summer Under the Stars presentations. That same year, John Wayne was replaced with Natalie Wood. I do not know what reason there was for the latter.

I do enjoy Summer Under the Stars; it is also true that there really is no such thing as an old film since a film is new the first time you see it no matter when it was made. However, we are getting into a hopeless rut: showing the same performers in the same films. I like how we are getting a large group of first timers, so that is a plus. However, if Turner Classic Movies is to advance, it must look to lesser-known players and/or feature lesser-known films from the big names. 

Otherwise, this might be my final Summer Under the Stars.

The Ministry of Ungentlemanly Warfare: A Review (Review #1830)

THE MINISTRY OF UNGENTLEMANLY WARFARE

How to appeal to the young kids to learn about such things as sacrifice, courage, fighting a monstrous evil. The answer is simplicity itself: turn everything into a joke. The Ministry of Ungentlemanly Warfare took a true story and turned it into something so outlandish and cartoonish that it makes one doubt that it is remotely based on a true story. Even that could be forgiven if it were fun and exciting. Instead, director/co-writer Guy Ritchie's answer to Inglourious Basterds is all style, not substance.

In 1942 the Second World War looks on the verge of ending with a British defeat. Prime Minister Winston Churchill (Rory Kinnear) decides that extraordinary methods must be used against a ruthless enemy. The Nazis are not playing by the rules, so the British should not either. With that, Brigadier Gubbins also known as "M" (Cary Elwes) is tasked to recruit a team for an unauthorized mission. This team must destroy the support system for German U-boats which are chocking off British supplies. The problem is that the U-boat cache is on a remote Spanish island off the African coast. With Spain officially neutral, an open British raid risks dragging the fascist Spanish government into the war. As such, Operation Postmaster must be completely hush-hush.

"M", with help from his aid Ian Fleming (Freddy Fox), finds Gus March-Phillips (Henry Cavill), whose unorthodox and dangerous methods are not to the government's liking but whose unorthodox and dangerous methods are what Operation Postmaster needs. He insists on recruiting his own team, an international and Academy Award-qualifying multicultural cast of figures to take on this mission. There's Irishman Henry Hayes (Hero Fiennes Tiffin), Swede Anders Lassen (Alan Ritchson), and Freddy Alvarez (Henry Golding). Helping him also are American actress Marjorie Stewart (Eliza Gonzalez) and their man on the island of Fernando Po, Richard Heron (Babs Olusanmokun). 

Gus also insists on rescuing his BFF, Geoffrey Appleyard (Alex Pettyfer) from a Nazi prison, requiring a side mission. Finally arriving on Fernando Po, the groups perform their tasks, with Marjorie set out to seduce and distract Nazi Heinrich Luhr (Til Schwieger), the Nazi head at Fernando Po. With the various pieces put together, this Ministry of Ungentlemanly Warfare sets to work on their most dangerous mission. Will they succeed? Will they all make it out alive?

If you are physically capable of staying awake to find those answers, you are made of stronger stuff than I am. I have not read Damien Lewis' Churchill's Secret Warriors, the nonfiction book on which The Ministry of Ungentlemanly Warfare was very loosely based on. I figure that the true-life story is a fascinating and exciting one to attempt a film version. 

However, I cannot think of a few films as boring as The Ministry of Ungentlemanly Warfare. The problem is in how Ritchie as both director and cowriter, took this story and decided to make everything deadpan. Perhaps by now I should not be astonished that there are four credited screenwriters in The Ministry of Ungentlemanly Warfare. However, I am still astonished that four people managed to take a true-life war story and turn it into a thoroughly fictional project.

The problem is a simple one but one that doomed The Ministry of Ungentlemanly Warfare: the tone. The film is so deadpan and stylized that it looks artificial. Everyone acts in such a nonchalant manner that it makes both the action and the comedy look fake. It is one thing to have someone make a quip at what is meant to be a tense or exciting scene. It is another when your film is almost nothing but quips. The Ministry of Ungentlemanly Warfare simply tries too hard to be breezy and fun, which has the opposite result. 

Take the Appleyard rescue. Leaving aside how we got a recap of information that we already received, everyone in the rescue is directed to be so deadpan in their delivery that it comes across almost as spoof. I get that the filmmakers were trying to make everything look breezy, fun and almost a lark. However, they went overboard in their endeavors. Anders has shot a group of Nazis with his bow and arrows. Gus, Hayes and Freddy all see the Nazis fall to their deaths and they register no reaction, apart from perhaps a wry bemusement. It is as if they are so removed from things that it is of no consequence what actually happens.

The whole cast is trying so hard, so very hard, to be so cool and blase that it looks fake. It tells the audience, "None of this is real". If it is not real, why should we care what happens to these people? 

During the Appleyard rescue, Christopher Benstead's jazz score, while enjoyable, underscores the falseness of it all. There are no stakes, no potential for moments of genuine tension or suspense. It is all very remote, very separated, very off-putting. 

It ends up looking forced, mannered and worse of all, dull.

I struggled mightily to stay awake through it. I wrote in my notes how I was both fighting and desperate to stay awake. I would not be surprised if some of the actors struggled to stay awake during filming. My disdain for Henry Cavill is well-known and, in some corners, openly mocked. The Ministry of Ungentlemanly Warfare does not suggest that Cavill is an actor. It manages to remove the idea that he is even an action star. To be fair, Cavill is asked to be deadpan, which is at about his level of acting skills, so he is not too bad. However, Cavill's character is all raised eyebrows and "old boy" this and "old girl" that. Elwes genuinely made me wonder whether he was deliberately hamming it up with the British aplomb manner. 

Everyone in the cast appears to treat everything as a joke, one where they can be so "veddy proper" that it is not fun or funny. Playing into the stereotype of the forever unbothered British sucks the life out of things. Ritchson, this mountain of a man, attempts what I think is a Swedish accent. I doubt anyone would mistake him for Ingrid Bergman's brother. 

There is a stubborn remoteness to everything in The Ministry of Ungentlemanly Warfare. The action scenes, culminating in what is meant to be a massive series of explosions, looks so distant and dull. The shocking discovery that Luhr makes about Stewart's heritage when she inadvertently uses Yiddish while singing Mack the Knife is not tense. That she gets out of it rather easily and quickly undercuts even the pretense of tension.  

Yes, I suppose the entire sequence is pretty. It is also pretty dull.

The Ministry of Ungentlemanly Warfare is a waste. Boring, trying too hard to be fun and breezy, it might have been better to have stuck to a more realistic adaptation than this stab at war hijinks. 

DECISION: F

Deadpool & Wolverine: A Review (Review #1829)

DEADPOOL & WOLVERINE

I was pretty much appalled by Deadpool, snarky and violent. I was in the minority though, as millions loved it precisely for those qualities. I cannot remember if I saw Deadpool 2, but now we have Deadpool & Wolverine. It is what I figure Deadpool and Marvel Cinematic Universe fans wanted: the blending of the unserious Merc with a Mouth and the uber-serious Logan. If that appeals to you, then I figure Deadpool & Wolverine is right up your street. If you don't, and you don't keep up with every minute detail of the world's longest and most expensive soap opera, then there is nothing in Deadpool & Wolverine to convert you.

Wade Wilson/Deadpool (Ryan Reynolds) is searching for Logan/Wolverine, but surprisingly finds him dead. That does not stop him from using Logan's remains to fight off a group of fighters while dancing to N*Sync's Bye Bye Bye. Why does Deadpool need Wolverine? Well, we have to back up a bit.

Deadpool wanted to join the Avengers but was rejected by Happy Hogan (Jon Favreau). Dejected by being rejected, Wade has been miserable working as a used car salesman with his friend Peter (Rob Delaney). His birthday party causes him no joy since his ex-girlfriend Vanessa (Morena Baccarin) is also there. Things pick up a bit when agents of the Time Variance Authority come in to take him to renegade TVA bureaucrat Mr. Paradox (Matthew Macfayden). 

Paradox tells Deadpool that the Sacred Timeline is being affected and that while he can remain, his own timeline has to be obliterated due to the death of Deadpool's anchor being. That anchor being is Logan. Rather than see his loved ones erased, Deadpool will find his anchor being and prevent him from dying.

That's thirty minutes before we go back to where we started and move forward. 

He does eventually find Logan (Hugh Jackman), though his Logan/Wolverine is the worst of all of them. Thrown into the Void, Logan and Wolverine must join forces to fight both Paradox and Cassandra Nova (Emma Corrin), unofficial ruler of the Void and Charles Xavier/Professor X's twin sister. 

As a side note, is baldness both a hereditary trait and requirement in the Xavier family? 

From there, they meet various heroes and villains from past MCU movies, even those not from the official Marvel Cinematic Universe. There's Johnny Storm/Human Torch (Chris Evan), Elektra Natchios (Jennifer Garner), Gambit (Channing Tatum), Laura/X-23 (Dafne Keen) and Blade (Wesley Snipes). There are also villains such as Pyro (Aaron Stanford) working against the Resistance, as well as those in between such as the various Deadpools in other worlds. Nicepool (Reynolds in a dual role) is in the Void as well. Ultimately Deadpool & Wolverine must fight to keep all the timelines intact.

Deadpool & Wolverine has five credited screenwriters including both Reynolds and director Shawn Levy. I always take such a high number of credited screenwriters as a cause for alarm. It smacks of writing by committee; it suggests that there are too many cooks in the kitchen who couldn't form a unified vision. It also tells me that there were probably more hands on the project than people are willing to admit. 

With so many people hacking away at a script, it looks like Deadpool & Wolverine opted for a "more is more" plan. All kinds of fan service were thrown at the viewer (Chris Evans as the Human Torch from earlier Fantastic Four films! The original Blade is back! The Alabaman Channing Tatum as the Cajun Gambit!). Double, triple, quadruple down on all these callbacks and throw in some more. Shoutouts both metaphorical and literal to Furiosa and the demise of Twentieth Century-Fox. 

For me, a reason as to why I thoroughly disliked though not detested Deadpool & Wolverine is what so many people loved about it. The various callbacks, the fourth wall breaking, the "aren't we being clever" bits did not impress me. There were many people laughing at various parts, such as a major fight between Deadpool and Wolverine to Grease's You're the One That I Want. I do not take away from anyone's enjoyment of such things. I just want, for myself, something with a little more substance, even in a comic book film.

Pointing out things like montages or how a particular creature was in a Loki episode cuts no ice with me. In fact, it separates me from any serious stakes. Why Logan in particular is Wade's anchor being is unclear (and I think I'm being generous in using that word). The few times Deadpool & Logan pause to give Jackman a more dramatic moment seems jarringly at odds with all the craziness going on around here. Far be it for Wade/Deadpool to have a serious moment. I think the film tried, but no one would believe it. 

Moreover, since we have all these variants going on in multiple universes, there are no stakes to anything here. 

The various cameos did not impress me. I get that Tatum was always in the running for a separate Gambit film. However, separate from the fact that Taum has no acting skills or any real skills apart from taking his clothes off, the deliberately exaggerated Cajun accent was maddening. Pointing out that he was almost unintelligible is not clever. It only draws more attention to a gag that was not funny to start with. Having Snipes say, "There's only going to be one Blade!" could be mildly amusing. Having Reynolds as Deadpool face the camera to give us a knowing look is not. 

Also, why throw in a Furiosa reference when presumably in any of their worlds the Mad Max franchise would not necessarily exist. 

I don't think there were any performances here. People came, cashed their checks, and moved on. Taking jabs at the presumably high salaries is not impressive or clever. After Evans' Johnny Storm is killed, Reynolds' Deadpool tells Logan "Do you know what he was doing to the budget?". Sure, the audience laughed, but I did not. I did not laugh once at Deadpool & Wolverine, though did find myself nodding in agreement when Logan mocks Deadpool. Wolverine rants that Deadpool can't save the world, he couldn't even save his relationship with a stripper! Yet I digress.

I suppose it's nice for Jackman to show off his incredible physique at age 55, but it would be nice if he actually moved on in his career. The same for 47-year-old Reynolds, who has been doing the same snarky schtick since Two Guys, A Girl and a Pizza Place back in 1998. I liked the show, but how is he still doing a variation of Berg all these decades later. Jackman did best in the few dramatic scenes he was in. His Logan was fine, but I was not overwhelmed. Macfayden could have been fun as Paradox, but I wonder if he even knew what was going on. Tatum did not make clear whether Gambit was the joke or just in on it. Garner looked bored and almost desperate to get out of things. Snipes looked like was having a good time.

Oddly, I did not find Deadpool & Wolverine to be as violent as I thought it would be. Yes, you do get graphic depictions of all sorts of killings. However, I was curiously numb to it all. 

The entire premise of Deadpool & Wolverine (Deadpool doing what he can to save his friends) got a bit lost in the Paul Rudd jokes and shade throwing. I did not know those characters enough to make the stakes feel high. I just did not care for the film on any level. 

"I don't want to spend my life being an annoying one-trick pony," Wade Wilson tells Happy Hogan early in Deadpool & Wolverine. That's about the only funny thing in Deadpool & Wolverine since that's the only thing Deadpool has ever been. Deadpool & Wolverine sorely test whether it is better than Argylle. Very briefly, it was worse than Argylle. It is teetering on the edge, but Deadpool & Wolverine did not leave me in a state of shaking fury as Argylle did. It left me cold, which may be worse. 

DECISION: F

King Kong Lives: A Review

 

KING KONG LIVES

The 1976 King Kong remake has been, in my opinion, unfairly bashed as terrible. It is not a good film, but I find it oddly entertaining and much better than the second remake. I had heard of King Kong Lives but was too young at the time to see it. Moreover, what little I knew was due to Gene Siskel and Roger Ebert's extremely negative review. Now, through the magic of streaming, I have seen King Kong Lives. Living up to its reputation, King Kong Lives is a mix of the 1976 and 2005 versions. It is terrible (2005) but oddly entertaining (1976). 

A decade after King Kong fell to his apparent death from the World Trade Center, we find that he is not dead. He is in a coma, kept alive artificially at the Atlanta Institute, a rival to MIT and Harvard. Dr. Amy Franklin (Linda Hamilton) has an artificial heart ready for Kong, but due to his decade-long coma, he needs a blood transfusion to have the artificial heart work. It is not, however, like there are giant apes running around somewhere, right?

Of course, wrong. Explorer Hank Mitchell (Brian Kerwin) just happened to stumble onto a giant monkey in Borneo. He offers "Lady Kong" to the institute for a price. Price met, Mitch flies Lady Kong to what I presume is Atlanta so Mr. Kong can have transfusion and his new heart.

It gets sillier from here. 

Unsurprisingly, Dr. Franklin strongly objects to having a female Kong so close to a male Kong, fearing they will go ape for each other. Unsurprisingly, Dr. Franklin and white hunter Mitchell also go ape for each other. King Kong is so aroused by Lady Kong's scent that he storms his way to her. The search for this ape allows Franklin and Mitchell to storm their way to each other. Lady Kong is recaptured, King Kong hides out in the Georgia swamps, is captured by rednecks whom he devours, then they are reunited in time for Lady Kong to give birth to Son of Kong. Will the family Kong (King, Lady and Donkey) manage to escape?

King Kong Lives and the 1976 King Kong have one thing in common: both are blessed with a musical score that is so far above the film itself. John Scott's score is wonderful, flowing and enjoyable. He created luxurious romantic music when we see scenes of romance. It is not his fault, though, that the romantic music played when King and Lady Kong finally set eyes on each other.

There is something absolutely and oddly hilarious about lush music when you see two adults in ape costumes making googly-eyes at each other. That director John Guillermin never saw just how odd to laughable the mix of music and images come across makes one wonder whether he and everyone involved in King Kong Lives was bonkers. These love scenes between the Kongs are just weird. The love scene between Franklin and Mitchell are not far behind. The dialogue by Ronald Shusett and Steven Pressfield does not help. Just as Mitchell is to start making love to Amy, he says, "Are you sure about this?". Her response? "We're primates too", she whispers.

Why these two fell so suddenly in love King Kong Lives does not bother explaining. How King Kong lives all these years King Kong Lives does not bother explaining. Why King Kong lives at all King Kong Lives does not bother explaining. What is the plan once the heart transplant goes? What are they going to do with Kong after he recovers from surgery? There's no setup, so there are no stakes. It is all very strange to idiotic. 

About the only moment of wit is when the Army comes to the Georgian backwaters to find dozens of rednecks with their shotguns looking for a giant ape that has managed to hide in various swamps. "What the hell is this: Deliverance?" one of them says. 

Over and over again, the strange blending of music and imagery makes King Kong Lives look bad and unintentionally funny. At least, I think it was not meant to be funny. Late in the film, there's a scene where Kong is rampaging through a small town. There is an old man with a shotgun apparently just shooting around in random. Everything here is hilarious. A later scene at a family reunion hoedown is equally bizarre. We see the Kongs walking towards them, the hootenanny oblivious to these giant creatures coming their way. "You never know who's going to show up in our of these family reunions, do you?" one of them says to the other as we see the Kongs coming closer and closer.

I get what King Kong Lives was going for. I also get that they were too obvious and forced about it to make it funny. Funny is when Lady Kong grabs Mitchell. I almost expected her to say how she would hug him and squeeze him and call him "George". The scene where King Kong chomps down on an alligator while a frog looks on is inexplicable to me. Throwing in gruesome endings for some of the rednecks is appalling.  

King Kong Lives was made after The Terminator. As such, why Linda Hamilton opted to use what cache she earned from The Terminator to star in this rubbish I can only guess at. She looks blank throughout, making the idea that she is a brilliant physician frankly ludicrous. Kerwin is no better, attempting "brash and daring" and ending up looking desperate, confused and embarrassed. John Ashton as barking Lt. Col. Nevitt was a stereotype, almost always yelling out his lines and chomping the scenery with crazed abandon.

The 1976 King Kong won a special Academy Award for its Visual Effects, which I find strange given how poor the VFX were in King Kong. They are Lord of the Rings quality compared to the simply awful VFX in King Kong Lives. Even 1940's B-pictures had better rear screen projections than King Kong Lives. The two people playing Kong and Lady Kong (Peter Elliot and George Yiasomo respectively) running around in what are meant to be mountains look so idiotically fake that even children would say it was a set. When Nevitt meets his end, everything about it is bad: the acting, the look, the end results. 

There is no reason for King Kong Lives. Minus the music everything in King Kong Lives is dreadful. Despite that, I did not hate King Kong Lives. It is just short of being so bad that it's good. It is more "so bad that it's watchable if you want to laugh at how bad it all is". King Kong Lives, but one wishes he had stayed most sincerely dead. 

DECISION: D-    

The Golden Girls: Nice and Easy

 

THE GOLDEN GIRLS: NICE AND EASY

Written by: Stuart Silverman

Directed by: Terry Hughes

Airdate: February 1, 1986

There are some family traditions that perhaps should not be followed, such as promiscuity. Nice and Easy takes a character's familiar trait, amplifies it onto a new character, and gives us both funny moments and insight into the original character. 

Blanche Deveraux (Rue McClanahan) is excited to have her favorite niece Lucy (Hallie Todd) come to visit and perhaps transfer to a local university. When Lucy arrives, she tells Aunt Blanche that she met a gorgeous doctor on the plane and wants to go out with him. Blanche is thrilled that her unofficial protege is modeling herself on her. Her delight increases when Lucy tells her that she is flying to the Bahamas with Michael. That delight is short-lived, however, when her housemate Dorothy Zbornak (Bea Arthur) tells Blanche that Michael is not the doctor. He's her college interviewer, whom Lucy met hours ago. In the words of Dorothy's mother, Sophia Petrillo (Estelle Getty), "Girl's a slut". 

Blanche's shock turns to anger when Lucy comes to the house late at night to pick up some things before going with Ed Collins (Ken Stovitz), a Miami vice officer who arrested Michael for drug smuggling. As Blanche cooly says, Ed picking up Michael was Ed doing his job. Lucy picking up Ed was something entirely different. A defiant Lucy storms out with Ed to his place. Blanche, Dorothy, Sophia and Rose Nylund (Betty White) go to Ed's apartment, where Blanche explains to Lucy that there is a difference between enjoying men and letting men enjoy her. Reconciled, they all go back home.

In a subplot, Dorothy is appalled to find a rat in the house. Rose is adamant about not killing the rat, insisting that she could communicate with animals. It turns out that maybe Dorothy can too, delighting Rose and irritating Dorothy. Will Dorothy have the heart to kill a living thing and a fellow mammal?

We learn that Blanche has a niece, though how exactly Lucy connects to the Widow Deveraux we do not know. Judging from the dialogue, Lucy is either Charmaine or Virginia's daughter since Blanche asks Lucy if her "mother" would let her do something. I lean towards Lucy's mother being Charmaine because Blanche, after reciting some of her wild antics in her rebellious stage, says that she had her big sister Charmaine to pull her out of her excesses. We also learn about Tyler's Landing, the flashy, seedy town near Rose's hometown, still unnamed but presumably "Little Falls". 

I found three sections from Nice and Easy that are cut from reruns. There is a section where Rose expands on her ability to go all Doctor Doolittle. There is additional dialogue about Lucy's romp with both the doctor and Michael that is cut. The scene where Blanche is told about how promiscuous and wanton Lucy is gets removed too. It is a shame that these sections are not usually broadcast given that Arthur has one of the best lines here. As Rose goes on about her ability to talk to the animals, Arthur gives White a perfect deadpan look and says, "Rose, do you have any idea how weird you are?". 

Nice and Easy is hilarious and heartfelt. It is nice to see Blanche shocked by someone even more promiscuous than herself. Despite her own reputation as a woman of easy virtue, not even Blanche would go to bed with three different men in the course of forty-eight hours. She is appalled by this behavior, revealing another side to our Southern vixen. 

The episode gives insight into Blanche's worldview. As she tells Lucy, Blanche does enjoy the company of men and isn't ashamed of it; however, when Blanche submits to a man it is because she like him, not because she wants him to like her. Blanche pointedly tells Lucy that men do not find Lucy attractive but available. Blanche shows Lucy that their differences with men comes down to control: Blanche has it, Lucy does not. 

McClanahan plays this so very well, and Nice and Easy is a very good performance from her. Her scene with Todd is wonderful. She also has a great scene when countering Rose's story of when she went to meet up with a boy in Tyler's Landing which somehow evolved into her whole family becoming Lutherans. Her defiant recitation of her outrageous escapades from running off with an older man for a quickie marriage to performing as a Rockette under an assumed name is well acted.

White is also strong in Nice and Easy. She has a memorable moment when matching wits with Ed Collins, Miami Vice. One is surprised to learn that Rose Nylund adores the cop show Miami Vice, the mix of sweet, naive Rose delving into the criminal world of Miami a bit startling. The delight she has in answering Ed's allegedly difficult questions is wonderful. She also is great when doing her own oddball version of Our Town in her tale of the sordid love triangle Reverend McKenzie, Millie Beasley and her husband Emmett. 

Arthur has less to do, primarily relegated to the battle between Dorothy and the mouse. However, when she is talking to the rat, begging him to go so that she will not have to kill it, Arthur is extremely funny. Getty is able to rattle off some zingers in a strong way. There is when she declares Lucy a slut. After Dorothy tells Lucy that they loved having her, Sophia remarks, "So did half of Miami" in a somewhat audible way. 

Stovitz played the part of the himbo Ed very well, this young man so dumb that he modeled his life after the Sonny Crockett character without realizing it was all fantasy. His total idiocy outdid Rose, though to be fair Rose was merely naive and literal while Ed was just a moron. Todd did well, though I felt her Southern accent was a bit overdone. 

Nice and Easy is funny and moving, with the story moving well and with good performances. 

I wonder if Coco would have pointed out how so many men love Lucy. 

8/10

Next Episode: The Operation

Twisters: A Review

 

TWISTERS

I am not so enamored with nostalgia that I look on Twister as a good film. It is serviceable, entertaining, and mild escapist fare. We now, almost thirty years later, have something of a Twister sequel. Twisters is not original, not well-acted, at times laughable. In other words, it is serviceable, entertaining and mild escapist fare.

Plucky Kate Carter is part of the Tornado Tamer Project, a do-it-yourself group of tornado hunters who want to save lives and get funding. They come close to success when they find themselves caught in an EF5 tornado, the most destructive. Three of her colleagues are swept up into the storm and killed, including her boyfriend. Only she and her other male friend Javi survive.

Five years later, Kate (Daisy Edgar-Jones) is working for the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration in New York and still dealing with the post-traumatic stress from her experience. Into her world returns Javi (Anthony Ramos) with a job offer. He works for Storm Par, a company that is attempting to get better data on tornadoes. Kate decides to come out of retirement to go back into the field.

The field has changed dramatically since her high school sojourns. Now Storm Par and their ilk have to deal with brash figures such as Tyler Owens (Glen Powell), who dubs himself the Tornado Wrangler. Cocky and self-assured, Owens has built up his fame with a passionate fanbase that buys his T-shirts and mugs, quoting his phrase, "If you feel it, CHASE IT!". Javi's coworker Scott (David Corenswet) and the other Storm Par employees have nothing but contempt for these "hillbillies with a YouTube channel" as one of the Storm Par employees calls them. Kate, however, does not dismiss Tyler completely.

It becomes a battle between the Tornado Wrangler and the Tornado Whisperer for supremacy over the whirlwinds. Who is the mysterious figure Javi is working for, who swoops into devastated towns with apparently generous offers for the land? Is there more to Tyler Owens apart from his overall lusciousness? Who will live and who will die, who will fall in love and who will fall from the sky?

 I don't know if it is relevant or not, but I was surprised that Twisters stars Glen Powell and Daisy Edgar-Jones would have little to no memory of Twister or its impact on the public at the time.  Powell was a mere eight years old when Twister was released. Edgar-Jones was not even born yet (she was born two years after Twister premiered). Again, it might not be important, and it probably isn't. It just surprised me that for a film that in part rides on a Twister nostalgia, those involved with Twisters have little to no connection to the source material.

In a sense that is good. Twisters is not riding on the Twister coattails save for name recognition. We were spared any connection to the past. Twisters works separate from Twister, which again I think is good.

However, we do not have a flying cow, which for reasons I never understood was one of the things people were anticipating when watching Twister. Mark L. Smith's screenplay is a textbook example of how lazy and unoriginal a film can be. When Kate goes back into the field, Javi runs down the various Storm Par storm chasers. We learn what schools and government administrations they came from. We just never learned their names save for Scott, whom Javi introduces by name. Instantly, I knew that the other Storm Par people were unimportant, irrelevant and would soon be forgotten. 

I was right: by the time we get to the final storm, we see only Javi and Scott. Where the other Storm Par people are, who knows and who cares.

Compare that with the Tornado Wrangler crew. We learn all their names, even if they were forgotten for long sections of Twisters. They were just there to contrast to the Storm Par crew: the former were wild, wacky and fun, the latter stern and serious. Whom were we supposed to like: the always excited and shouty Boone (Brandon Perea) or the mean, arrogant and snobbish Scott? The contrast is given by how both groups respond to a devastated community. Storm Par starts looking for people to make low bids on their property to. Tornado Wrangler and Company, we learn, sells those tacky t-shirts to provide funds for storm relief. One of the Tornado Wrangler crew, Lily (Sasha Lane) even offers free food and water to Kate, informing her of the Tornado Wrangler's charitable work.

The Tornado Wrangler does not launch fireworks into tornadoes for clicks or subscribers or fame. He does it because he cares. Given the devastation those who survived tornadoes would have endured, would it not make more sense for the Tornado Wrangler to just ask his followers to donate to established relief organizations rather than use proceeds from those t-shirts with his name and face on them to help out? That bit of information was thrown in just to make Owens and his team sympathetic. 

That effort to compare and contrast Tornado Wrangler to Storm Par is not necessarily insulting, but apart from Powell's pretty face and good physique, I don't think I could muster any interest in the Tornado Wrangler's hijinks. Why not have Storm Par and Tornado Wrangler join forces: the former's scientific know-how with the latter's derring-do? 

It is curious that despite the advances in technology, I found the visual effects in Twisters rather rote and almost boring. Part of it might be due to director Lee Isaac Chung, who kept things at a distance. Part of it, though, came from how uninvolved everyone was. I put aside how those at the rodeo and farmers market apparently never experienced a tornado despite living in Tornado Alley. None of them, for example, seemed to know what to do when a twister came their way. Apparently, they would have rodeos and farmers markets despite the high probability of tornadoes coming their way. Yet I digress.

The VFX left me cold. What I figure was meant to be tense and exciting was anything but. As Tyler and Katie race across an exploding oil refinery, I felt nothing. As Tyler holds on to Lily to stop her from being swept away, all I kept wondering is exactly how strong physically is Tyler to withstand wind speeds greater than 322 MPH. Early on, I don't know if the goal was to have me laugh when Katie's early crew gets swept away. Her boyfriend telling her he's got her then instantly flying off had me suppress my laughter. One of her compatriots whose name I didn't bother remembering (which Twisters wasn't going to give much time to anyone), I referred to as "Harriet Potter" due to the physical resemblance. 

The VFX in short were not impressive. The vehicle crashing into the pool was not flying cow.

Twisters is also poorly acted. Perea came across as annoying as Boone, forever screaming enthusiastic. British reporter Ben (Harry Hayden-Paton) was a stock character veering on stereotype: the uptight Brit unaware of things. Edgar-Jones did fine as the plucky scientist slowly coming out of her trauma. It was not something great, especially when attempting to show her grief late in the film. It was okay, a word I hate using but struggling to find another that works. Powell was all hunky and took a stab at being vulnerable. He was better when he was cocky than when he was not. Ramos looked blank and at times was too restrained. It is curious that when he reprimands Katie for making a major mistake due to her PSTD, he was actually mild versus genuinely angry.

Twisters used good music, but to punctuate the scenes with "appropriate" songs is lazy. Why did we have to have (Ghost) Riders in the Sky play when the Tornado Wrangler is chasing the storm? Playing a song called Out of Oklahoma play when Katie finally sees her mother Cathy (Maura Tierney) is too on the nose. 

Twisters is passable entertainment, but I found the original to be better on almost every level. It's fine, and I guess that is fine. 

DECISION: C-

The Golden Girls: The Truth Will Out

THE GOLDEN GIRLS: 

THE TRUTH WILL OUT

Written by: Susan Beavers

Directed by: Terry Hughes

Airdate: January 18, 1986

Many family issues and struggles result from one source: money. The Truth Will Out is, in retrospect, not a sign of a daughter's greed so much as disappointment. I see it with new eyes, making a case that a character long thought of as evil is actually misunderstood.

Rose Nylund (Betty White) is both happy and worried about an upcoming family visit. Her daughter Kirsten (Christina Belford) and granddaughter Charley (Brigette Andersen) are coming, but it is not just a friendly stopover. Kirsten is executrix of Rose's will, so she is coming in part to look over the estate papers. That is what worries Rose. For her part, Rose's housemate Blanche Deveraux (Rue McClanahan) is more interested in a high society murder case to give much thought to whatever deep, dark Nylund family secrets there may be.

Secrets there are as Kirsten is upset to angry that her mother's estate does not have the millions that Kirsten's late father made. Rose tells Kirsten that she squandered the money on bad investments and get-rich-quick schemes, but the truth is much simpler. Rose, however, does not want to tell Kirsten out of fear of some kind. However, when Rose learns from her late husband's namesake that the only things she knows about Charlie is that he was handsome and very rich, she decides it is time for the truth. Charlie Nylund was not a good businessman. A mix of incompetence and generosity left him not broke but with few assets at the time of his death. Reconciled, Kirsten and Rose go to lunch, figuring the estate can cover a meal for three.

This is the first time we meet one of Rose's children and grandchildren. Rose has mentioned that she has a son, but Kirsten is one of the few Nylund children to pop up on the series. It is unclear whether Kirsten is married or not. They do still live in Minnesota, if not necessarily "Little Falls" (I don't think "St. Olaf" has been mentioned yet). Kirsten seems sensible and rational, making it strange to think she emerged from what Dorothy in the future would refer to as "the cradle of idiocy". As a side note, presuming that Alma Lindstrom, last seen in Blanche and the Younger Man, was still alive during the events of The Truth Will Out, Charley would have known her great-grandmother. 

There is only one section cut from The Truth Will Out in repeats. It is before Kirsten and Charley arrive where Blanche shows off some new purchases, Sophia keeps getting Charlie (the husband) and Charley (the granddaughter) mixed up and more about the murder case Blanche is obsessed with. She can't be that obsessed though, for despite it being the "Duncan Osgood" case, she at another time calls it the "Paxton Osgood" case. 

I think there is a sense among Golden Girls fans that Kirsten is basically a bitch for being so harsh against Rose over her lack of inheritance. I initially did not think well of Kirsten's reaction to finding out that she will not be living on easy street after her mother drops dead. I do still think that Kirsten was terribly wrong in emphasizing to Charley that Charlie Nylund was "very, very rich". Up to a point, I can see why she did. In The Truth Will Out, Rose mentions how Charlie was away from home so often due to work that he and the kids did not know each other as much as they would have liked. Still a bad thing to emphasize to your daughter on how their grandfather was loaded and they would be too once Grandmama kicked the bucket. 

Having a little more distance and perspective, I think Kirsten was somewhat right to be upset. I picture that Kirsten thought that with the inheritance she thought she would collect from the estate she could provide better and more to Charley. In short, she, I think, was counting on the money for her and Charley's future. Therefore, finding out that there was no money would devastate her dreams and plans. I can see now why she would be upset if we apply that thinking.

Still does not make it right to cut off your own mother because you are not getting more money, but it does not sound so cruel or arrogant if you look at it from that perspective. Your kids should be your top priority. Rose lied about the millions Charlie had in a way to protect him and make him successful to his kids. Kirsten may have wanted the money she thought she would get to provide for Charley. It also altered the way Kirsten saw both her parents, so I can somewhat see why Kirsten reacted as she did. 

Again, to cut your parent off over money is cruel, but looking at it again, I think Kirsten has gotten a bit of a bum rap over the will. 

On the whole, I think the performances are quite good. Belford has a more patrician air than I imagine someone who would be Rose's daughter would. Belford did well in more amusing moments such as presenting Dorothy and Blanche some very sweet logs. However, it was mostly drama that Belford had to do, and I think she did well. I thought Andersen was cute without being cloying. Her scene with White in which Charley discusses her childish ideas about going on a date with a prince or telling Rose all she knows about Grandpa were strong.

As a side note, Brigette Andersen died at 21 due to a heroin overdose. Seeing this sweet, adorable child give a good performance while knowing her ultimate fate makes it hard to watch. 

White again gave an excellent performance. She has the naive Rose who does not realize that the sugary logs are distasteful. She also has a more dramatic side, where she confesses the truth about Charlie. 

It is unfortunate that McClanahan, Arthur and Getty had less to do. To be fair, Arthur has a great moment where she attempts to dissuade Rose from giving out too much information by faking sleep only to reveal that she was perfectly awake. Getty too managed to throw out some good lines, such as when she is told by Rose that she and Charley are having a makeup lesson. "I hope the kid can help you. You wear more rogue than Miss Piggy", Sophia tells her. However, McClanahan had little to do but go on about the "Duncan/Paxton Osgood case". 

The Truth Will Out is an episode I saw with a new perspective. I grew less hostile to Kirsten Nylund. No, not sympathetic or thinking that she was in the right. However, I think she is not the monster many think she is. Well-acted though with the flaw of the Osgood case, The Truth Will Out works well. 

If Charley needed makeup tips, I figure Coco would have been as helpful to her as Rose would have been.     

7/10

Next Episode: Nice and Easy

The Golden Girls: In A Bed of Rose's

THE GOLDEN GIRLS: IN A BED OF ROSE'S

Written by: Susan Harris

Directed by: Terry Hughes

Airdate: January 11, 1986

For being the most innocent and least sexually experienced of the four Golden Girls, Rose Nylund (Betty White) has the worst luck whenever she indulges in the pleasures of the flesh. Her beloved husband Charlie died while they were making love. Now in In a Bed of Rose's, she faces the same scenario with a more shocking twist. Yes, more shocking than having a lover die with her in bed. Allowing Rose to have outrageous and tender moments, In a Bed of Rose's takes what should be a serious situation and makes it hilarious.

Rose Nylund finds herself in a strange situation when she brings her latest beau Al Beatty (Richard Roat) home with her. This is the first time she has ever brought a potential lover back to her home and she is concerned that her other housemates will discover her liaison. Al assures her that he will be quiet, but the next morning two of her housemates, Blanche Deveraux (Rue McClanahan) and Dorothy Zbornak (Bea Arthur) comment about all the racket they heard from her bedroom last night. Whether Dorothy's mother, Sophia Petrillo (Estelle Getty) heard Rose's "nightmare" is unknown. Sophia, however, does mention that there is a man in Rose's bed. That man, however, just so happens to be dead.

Rose is horrified that she slept with a dead man. Having already lost her husband during a sexual encounter, Rose is convinced that she somehow has the power to kill men through sex. The trauma of a second man dying after having sex with her is already bad enough for Rose. She, however, learns to her horror that Al's "sister" who lived with him is actually his wife (Priscilla Morrill). Rose decides that the right thing to do is to tell Mrs. Beatty in person that her husband is dead, even if it means exposing herself as his newest mistress. 

Rose is devastated by the turn of events and swears off any future romances until Mrs. Beatty gives her unexpected news. With that, Rose opts three months later to try again, but has history repeated itself yet again?

In a Bed of Rose's confirms what will be one of the few elements that stayed consistent throughout the series: how Charlie Nylund died. Charlie Nylund died during an act of lovemaking with Rose, something first mentioned in Rose the Prude and later in The Heart Attack. Now with In a Bed of Rose's, the truth about poor Charlie is revealed to all (Rose having told only her then-boyfriend Arnie and later, Dorothy). We also learn that George Deveraux was killed in a car accident when a driver drove headfirst into him going down the wrong way. 

Two parts are cut from reruns. The first is more about how Blanche learned of George's death, reported to her by a disinterested policeman eating chips over the phone. Blanche observes that Rose would not eat chips while calling Mrs. Beatty about her husband's death. The other cut section is the story Rose tells of Inga Lundqvist, a neighbor who accidentally shredded her husband. This story is brought up when the three other women go square dancing while Rose insists on staying at home. It does not completely impact the flow of In a Bed of Rose's, but it does leave some context out.

Betty White earned the Outstanding Lead Actress in a Comedy Series with the episode In a Bed of Rose's, and I can see why. She balances the comedy of the bizarre situation with a genuine heart when making the difficult decision to tell Mrs. Beatty that not only had her husband been unfaithful but was dead. White never hits a wrong note in the episode. She milks Rose's continuing inability to not take the expression "he bought the farm" literally. The combination of shock and sadness when discovering Al's repeated infidelities mixed with her own guilt about two men dying on her makes White moving. 

White has a great reaction to when Sophia rubs in her plight. After Dorothy asks Rose if she'll be all right alone, Sophia replies, "She'll be fine. If anyone breaks in, she'll just have to sleep with them," leading to a priceless White face.

While Betty White won the Emmy for In a Bed of Rose's, I am surprised that Priscilla Morrill was not nominated for Outstanding Guest Actress in a Comedy Series. She too has wonderful facial expressions, such as initially dismissing whatever bad news Rose came to tell her. "Well, you couldn't be pregnant," she states. Once she learns of Al's death, the shift from comedy to drama is excellent. As she attempts to talk herself out of believing the news, we see the devastation she feels, as well as the genuine love Mrs. Beatty had for Al despite his inability to stay faithful. She has a wonderful closing line for her first scene with Rose. After Rose continues berating herself for what happened, Mrs. Beatty looks straight at her. "Mrs. Nylund, you've been sleeping with my husband who has just died. See if you can pull yourself together because in a minute, I'm going to need some comforting myself!"

Oddly, while she is billed as "Lucille", I do not remember that name being used. If memory serves right, she was always referred to as "my sister" (when Al is lying to Rose about who she is), "his wife" and "Mrs. Beatty". She even calls herself "Mrs. Beatty" when she comes to the house to let Rose know that she had nothing to do with Al's death.

In a Bed of Rose's is probably the episode in which Arthur's Dorothy features least. McClanahan's Blanche has her story about learning of George's death. Getty's Sophia throws out zinger after zinger, mocking the dead body she found and throwing barbs at Rose. Arthur is not a major part of the episode, but it is not a terrible thing. 

One thing that did puzzle me is how when Rose talked about dating again three months after Al's death, she talks about going away with "Arnie". Did she get back together with the first man she slept with after Charlie's death? Why Arnie? At the moment, it is the innocent farmer's daughter who has ratcheted up the most lovers with three: Charlie, Arnie and Al. Maybe despite it all, Rose is the slut of the group. 

In a Bed of Rose's takes a surprisingly horrible situation and makes it hilarious. Blending moments of comedy with genuine drama and emotion, In a Bed of Rose's is another strong episode.

I figure Coco would have had to carry Al's body to the front yard if Rose had followed Sophia's advice. 

9/10

Next Episode: The Truth Will Out

The Golden Girls: That Was No Lady

THE GOLDEN GIRLS: THAT WAS NO LADY

Written by: Liz Sage

Directed by: Jim Drake

Airdate: December 21, 1985

The four women of The Golden Girls have had romantic issues, but Dorothy Zbornak (Bea Arthur) seems to have the more difficult ones. The only divorcee, Dorothy now finds herself on the other side in That Was No Lady. Strong performances and an interesting dilemma make up for a weak B-plot.

Dorothy is enthralled with Glen O'Brien (Alex Rocco), a gym teacher at the school she is working at. They quickly begin an affair, which she initially cuts off when he confesses that he is married. Conflicted, she finds no resolution when advised by her housemates Rose Nylund (Betty White) and Blanche Deveraux (Rue McClanahan). Rose is adamant that Dorothy cannot run around with a married man. Blanche suggests discretion, though she admits that despite her reputation she herself has never slept with a married man. For her part, Dorothy's mother Sophia Petrillo (Estelle Getty) is firmly against Dorothy being in her words, "somebody's floozy".

Blanche and Rose are for their part dealing with car troubles. Rose needs a new car and Blanche wants to dump her old car for a new one. Blanche offers Rose her car for a two-week trial, which initially works out for Rose. Soon, however, Rose starts having issues with the car which Blanche eventually reveals is a lemon she is trying to unload because the dealership won't give her the full Blue Book price. Fortunately for her, the car ends up stolen.

We learn not much about the characters in That Was No Lady but did get some great continuity contradictions which The Golden Girls became famous or notorious for. Rose recounts how she and Charlie first met. In her yet-unnamed hometown (which so far would be "Little Falls" from The Break-In), Rose met Charlie when she was seven and he was eight. He had a little street stand which sold not lemonade but insurance. It was love at first sight for both. Charlie was so much in love that he paid for a new red wagon when a group of hogs destroyed Rose's after seeing it carry a roast, even though her policy did not cover acts of swine. 

Going by her presumed age of 51 based on Rose the Prude, Charles "Charlie" Nylund would have been born in 1935. With that in mind, poor Charlie would have died in 1970 at the age of 37. I don't think it makes any sense, but by now on Episode 14 the show I think does not even bother to try and keep track of characters' ages or children/grandchildren.

Curiously, Rose's initial story of how she and Charlie met (at a dance) is cut from Rose the Prude when it is repeated, so most people who have never seen the complete episodes would take Rose's story of Charlie's insurance stand as their first meeting. In this situation, I think we do not have to be so strict. 

Three bits are cut from That Was No Lady rebroadcasts. There is more of Dorothy's initial reaction to Glen's confession about him being married. There is more of Dorothy and Rose discussing Dorothy's affair. Most famously, there is when Sophia starts singing Purple Rain while listening to it on cassette. This last part I figure is due to copyright issues. Prince's classic is not actually heard, but Getty merely quoting it apparently was enough to get it clipped from future showings. It is to the editing credit that it does not affect anything.

That Was No Lady is less funny than most Golden Girls episodes, but it is still effective. The secondary plot of Rose taking Blanche's car is not interesting apart from making Rose look dim. This is a more dramatic episode where we see Dorothy's conflict about being someone's mistress.

Arthur does an excellent job portraying Dorothy's various reactions to the situation. She shifts from horror and outrage to acceptance to realization that as she says, she is not cut out to be the other woman. The longing for Glen which makes her party to adultery shows how love can make anyone foolish. Arthur has two great scenes in the hotel room where she and Glen have their trysts. The first is when she shifts from the joy of love to the horror of infidelity. The second is when, after starting up her relationship, she sees that her temporary pleasure will not make her happy.

She and Getty have an especially strong scene near the end. Dorothy is at first defiant about her relationship with Glen, then almost pleading to her mother to see that she is happy. Sophia tenderly states to her daughter that if she is so happy, why does she hear Dorothy pace in her room all night. It is, Sophia points out, a feeling of guilt. She already made her position clear when she scolded Dorothy for being Glen's floozy. Sophia, unlike Rose, does not disapprove due to moral reasons. She disapproves because she knows being a mistress will only end up making her daughter miserable and wants to steer her back to a genuine happiness versus the temporary physical thrill.

Getty is excellent here, revealing a genuine love for Dorothy behind her stern disapproval. 

Perhaps the biggest surprise is McClanahan's Blanche. One would think someone who is known as a sexually vibrant woman would have been the other party in many relationships. However, in That Was No Lady she makes clear she does not step out with married men. Blanche explains it by saying that she knows that a married man will eventually feel guilty and give better gifts to the wife. However, I think she uses that excuse because at heart, Blanche is interested in sex but not at the cost of her integrity or in hurting others; in this case, The Golden Girls does establish consistency in that part of Blanche's character. There will be other episodes where she is firm in refusing to become sexually or romantically involved with married men, at least when she discovers that they are married. For all her promiscuity, Blanche Deveraux does have standards. 

As a side note, hearing Rose describe it as a den of iniquity is oddly amusing.

That Was No Lady still has moments of laughter, but they do not spring from large parts of the plot. They have funny lines, such as Sophia advising Dorothy to go bowling where she can rent shoes to wear. There are funny moments, such as when Dorothy in her shocked state attempts to storm out of the hotel room by going into the bathroom. However, That Was No Lady is more a well-crafted character study of finding that something that might feel right is not right.  

9/10

Next Episode: In A Bed of Rose's 

The Golden Girls: A Little Romance

THE GOLDEN GIRLS: A LITTLE ROMANCE

Written by: Mort Nathan and Barry Fanaro

Directed by: Terry Hughes

Airdate: December 14, 1985

In today's world, the term "midget" is taken as a slur comparable to "the N word" for African Americans or "wetbacks" for Hispanics. In 1985, not only was it seen a a mere descriptive word but something one could find humor in. A Little Romance won its writers an Emmy Award and I think it is well-deserved. I think A Little Romance is the funniest Golden Girl Season One episode yet, outrageous and hilarious.

Sophia Petrillo (Estelle Getty) is not looking forward to spending time with her son Phil and his wife, a welder, or their ten kids. She is leaving to see her grandson's graduation from animal grooming school, so she is unaware of Rose Nylund's (Betty White) newest beau. He is Dr. Jonathan Newman (Brent Collins), a psychiatrist at the grief center Rose works at. Rose is reluctant to talk about Dr. Newman or their relationship. She keeps delaying introducing Dr. Newman to her housemates Dorothy Zbornak (Bea Arthur) and Blanche Deveraux (Rue McClanahan). Blanche takes the opportunity to invite Dr. Newman to dinner when he calls.

It soon becomes clear why Rose was reluctant to have them meet Dr. Newman. He is a dwarf, leading to Blanche and occasionally Dorothy making inadvertently offensive puns. They are charmed by Dr. Newman, but then alarmed when Rose insists that Dr. Newman is going to propose marriage. Rose does not know what to do until the answer comes in a dream. With visits from a miniaturized version of Rose's father (Billy Barty) and "famed psychic Jeanne Dixon" (Dixon cameoing as herself), Rose decides to accept Dr. Newman's proposal. Rose, however, is in for a rude shock when she finds that Dr. Newman is not going to propose.

Despite not being a major part of the episode, we learn quite a bit about Sophia from A Little Romance. We learn that she is the grandmother of ten from Phil alone. Counting Dorothy's two children and at least one if not more from Gloria, she has at least thirteen grandkids. Phil, from these accounts, is not a MENSA member. I think the best description for Philip Petrillo would be "white trash". He married a welder whose father is in prison and who just kept having children after children: six boys, four girls. The grandson Sophia is going to see is 22 years old, meaning he was born in 1963. Why is that important? Well, it means that Phil more than likely met the same fate that Dorothy did, only in reverse. My guess would be that Philip would have had his own shotgun wedding. Moreover, as whether Philip or Gloria is the baby of the family flips back and forth, it is hard to know how old Phil was when he got married.

There is a surprising amount that is cut from A Little Romance on reruns, mostly around the dinner for Dr. Newman. There is Dr. Newman's initial reaction to Blanche's uncomfortableness with his stature. There is Dorothy and Blanche discussing Dr. Newman's merits. There is Dorothy's reaction to Blanche's story about her dating Benjamin, causing a scandal in her Southern community. There are cuts to both Blanche and Dorothy comforting Rose as she struggles with her decision. Most surprisingly is Rose's dream, which goes on much longer than it does on reruns. 

A Little Romance has two great highlights: the dinner with Dr. Newman and Rose's dream sequence. The dinner is hilarious thanks to McClanahan's performance. Blanche's total discomfort at the situation, where she constantly stumbles over her efforts to not offend, will have you laughing. No matter what Blanche tries to say or do, she keeps tripping over herself. Whether offering Dr. Newman shrimp or suggesting that it was a small world, McClanahan has us like Blanche because she obviously means no harm but keeps making a fool out of herself. 

McClanahan has a separate, brilliant moment separate from the events of A Little Romance when recounting her romance with a young man named Benjamin. The Blanche/Benjamin romance should be forbidden by the mores of the times, but ultimately Blanche rose to the occasion and went to Prom with Benjamin. Only Blanche Deveraux would make this story not only into an epic, but also lead us to think it was an interracial romance when the real scandal was that Benjamin was from New Jersey. As Blanche recounts with horror, she went to Prom with a Yankee!

The dream sequence is also brilliant because it allows almost everyone to ham it up and exaggerate to an almost unhinged manner. As it is clearly a dream, we accept the cartoonish manner that McClanahan and Arthur put into the performances. Even Collins is exaggerated in his performance when wooing a reluctant Rose. Billy Barty as Rose's father is not as over-the-top, but still within the spirt of the scene. Curiously, Barty is billed as "Edgar Lindstrom", but I do not remember the name being used. Interestingly, Getty is the only one who is not broad in her performance. She is mostly within her usual Sophia, but like Barty she too gets into the spirit of things. Still, seeing Sophia dressed as a traditional Catholic priest is impossible to resist.

A Little Romance has the first cameo in the series with Jeanne Dixon playing herself. I imagine that most people nowadays do not know or remember Dixon was. At the time of the episode, she was a well-known psychic who was alleged to have predicted the assassination of President Kennedy. I think she is a major flaw in A Little Romance for a variety of reasons. First, she dates the episode, for Dixon is pretty much a forgotten figure now. Second, her oddball predictions such as how Brooke Shields and "Lady Di" would star in a Broadway musical comedy or Jackie O will tie the knot again were not funny. Third, when she is announced as one of Rose and Jonathan's wedding guests, you got the sense that the cast had to pump up the audience's interest by leading the applause.

It is curious that while Dixon is the weak part of A Little Romance, the episode itself is hilarious from top to bottom. The situation itself, the characters' reaction to it, the side story of Blanche and Benjamin, and the twists within it all make it a great source of laughter. We get the twist ending of why Dr. Newman and Rose cannot be together. However, we get another twist when Sophia returns unexpectedly in time to meet Dr. Newman. Everyone handles things so well that it elevates the comedy. 

Everything in A Little Romance works, making it hilarious without being mean-spirited. Big things, it appears, do come in small packages. 

I imagine that Coco would have had more sense to serve shrimp and short ribs for dinner.

10/10

Next Episode: That Was No Lady

A Quiet Place: Day One. A Review

A QUIET PLACE: DAY ONE

I never imagined that A Quiet Place would somehow create its own universe. I have not seen as of this writing A Quiet Place II, so I cannot say whether the prequel A Quiet Place: Day One fits into the narrative. I thought of whether A Quiet Place: Day One stood on its own separate from this accidental franchise. On the whole, A Quiet Place: Day One tells its origin story effectively and efficiently. 

Hospice care patient Sam (Lupita Nyong'o) reluctantly goes into Manhattan with her beloved comfort cat Frodo, the promise of a theater performance followed by her favorite pizza too hard to resist. The hospice care nurse Reuben (Alex Woolf) does not exactly lie to her about the theater performance but does not mention that it is a marionette show. Afterwards, they observe meteors falling onto the streets. Determined to get her promised pizza, Sam initially won't leave but soon everyone rushes when creatures appear while the meteors start creating chaos.

Sam eventually comes to with others hiding in the theater, Reuben included. She learns that sound attracts the aliens, so everyone must be quiet or as quiet as possible. She observes more attacks and Reuben's shocking end, with only another survivor, Henri (Djimon Hounsou) to protect those hiding in the theater. Sam opts to follow the government's advice to go to waiting ships to flee but another attack causes her and Frodo to separate. She does manage to steer two children to safety but now she is trapped.

Also trapped is shell-shocked Eric (Joseph Quinn), a British law student who finds Frodo and later Sam. She reluctantly joins forces with Eric to attempt to escape New York, though not with difficulties made harder by the pain of her illness without pain medication. Will they survive to get to the waiting ships? Will Sam get her pizza?

One of the best qualities in A Quiet Place: Day One is that is has a brief running time of a little over an hour and forty minutes. As such, it never lingers long on situations that might have dragged it down. That is not to say that perhaps A Quiet Place: Day One might not have benefitted from a bit more cutting (such as in having Eric and Sam take more time at Sam's apartment or the pizza hunt). However, that is not a dealbreaker here.

A Quiet Place: Day One knows when to stay and when to go, keeping things flowing relatively well. Even if brief moments, the screenplay by director Michael Sarnoski (from a story by him and original A Quiet Place star/director John Krasinski) manages to have moments of both tension and character development. There is when Sam comes upon the two children who have taken shelter underneath a fountain (the creatures unable to hear voices masked by the flowing water). We see the danger everyone is in, coupled with Sam's genuine concern for these innocent kids.

Essentially, A Quiet Place: Day One is split between Sam & Reuben and Sam & Eric, as if she needs someone to counter her. Each part works well in showing her rapport with these two men. The parts with both come across as authentic: a sarcastic but caring association with the former, a mutual need to survive with the latter. 

The film builds up tension as to whether certain characters will survive, though in one part it seems a bit ludicrous how one of the characters dies. In what is meant to be a tense moment, a giant generator starts being loud. It is shut down, but then a minor rip of clothing is enough to have the creature take that person out. It seems a bit curious why the creature could hear something so soft but not go into full attack mode with something so loud.

It is, as a side note, interesting how A Quiet Place: Day One has faint echoes of September 11, 2001, in the look of both a destroyed Manhattan and the dust and debris on character's faces. I do not know if it was intentional, but it for me added a level of haunting to the film.

Many of the actors were called upon to act with their faces, and it is a credit to both Sarnoski and the actors that they communicated so much with looks and their eyes. Nyong'o does an exceptional job as Sam, a woman who finds a late surge to fight to live despite being close to death. She is the person with whom we are supposed to identify with, our guide into this hellish world. She shows us her mix of sorrow, horror, quiet joy and finally peaceful acceptance mostly through her face. Nyong'o does have moments where she speaks, and she is able to convince the viewer that Sam is caring if a bit cynical.

Wolff is simply unrecognizable as Reuben, a generally quiet character who does his job the best he can. He cares for his patients but is also not above a little deception to get his way. Hounsou has a limited role, appearing for probably less than ten minutes overall near the beginning and briefly at the end. Nevertheless, he manages to hold your attention as Henri, the de facto leader of these survivors. Quinn does good work too as Eric, bumbling, terrified, in need of anyone to be around. He and Nyong'o work well together, balancing each other with her leading him, albeit reluctantly and with no enthusiasm.

A Quiet Place: Day One also knows how to use moments of tension and moments of stillness. A scene where Sam is trapped is built up to create effective tension. Eric timing the thunder to make needed noise is also well-done. As a side note, there is a scene outside a bookstore between Sam and Eric that I found funny. The bookstore's name is Argyle Bookstore, and while I figure it is not a nod to Argylle, I still chuckled. 

A Quiet Place: Day One balances horror and heart. At times perhaps a bit illogical (the generator scene still puzzles me), the film still gives viewers the horror they want to see with some strong characters to care about. On the whole, A Quiet Place: Day One works both as a prequel and its own film separate from the previous A Quiet Place films. 

DECISION: B-