Ace Crawford, Private Eye: The Gentleman Bandit

ACE CRAWFORD, PRIVATE EYE: THE GENTLEMAN BANDIT

Written by: Mickey Rose

Directed by: Michael Preese

Original Airdate: April 12, 1983

RuPaul's Drag Race has nothing on Ace Crawford, Private Eye. The Gentleman Bandit, the last of this sitcom's five aired episodes, is a pretty bad way to close out this failed series. It is vaguely sexist and unpleasant, and that's before we get to see Tim Conway in a dress.

The staff at Business Woman Magazine are in danger. BWM's publisher Maureen Duffy (Marian Mercer) is concerned since eleven of her staff have been robbed, bound and gagged by a mysterious figure. The bandit was, despite stealing from them, a gentleman, leaving a signature chrysanthemum next to the bound, gagged and robbed woman. In desperation, Duffy turns to Ace Crawford (Tim Conway) to help solve the crimes and keep the BWM staff safe.  

Ace's efforts to infiltrate Business Woman Magazine's offices first stumble when he disguises himself as a cleaner. The Gentleman Bandit (Basil Hoffman) strikes right under Ace Crawford's nose. It does not help that Crawford's Guy Friday, CPA Toomey (Joe Regalbuto) has a cold, making his nose useless. Despite being sick, Crawford insists that Toomey go to the BWM office and be his second pair of eyes. Fortunately for both of them, The Shanty's chanteuse Luann (Shera Danese) volunteers to be the decoy. Unfortunately for them, the Gentleman Bandit strikes again, with Luann as his next victim. 

Now more determined to catch the Gentleman Bandit, Ace has to take matters into his own manicured hands. Toomey makes for an unconvincing woman, especially with him still under the weather. With that, Ace Crawford must don a wig and high heels to be the trap. The plan is to have Toomey be on watch outside while Crawford makes himself easy prey. The Gentleman Bandit finds "Ace Sinella" an irresistible target. Will Ace and Toomey manage to capture the master criminal? Will Ace end up arrested for prostitution? 

It is curious that the Gentlemen Bandit turns out to be anything but. We find that he really is a bitter man, angry at having been replaced at Business Woman Magazine by a computer and an aggressive woman. For a sitcom, seeing women bound and gagged is rather uncomfortable viewing. 

One of the curious elements in The Gentleman Bandit is how we see that Ace Crawford is really a very nasty person. Most of the time, Ace is mean and belittling to Toomey. This time, he is that way with Luann. It looks like no matter who is his assistant, Ace will always trash them.

This time, however, Ace went a bit too far. His ineptness and bumbling put Luann in danger. He was so tangled up in the large cleaning machine that he could not hear Luann's screams for help. Once Ace stumbles onto the bound and gagged Luann, it never, not once, occurred to him to help her. He did not seem to care that Luann was tied up and lying helpless. Instead, Ace Crawford is lecturing her about how inept she was and how detective work is dangerous. 

It is one thing to make your lead endearingly oblivious. In this case, Ace came across as insensitive to downright cruel. He clearly did not care about Luann or her plight. Even the most clueless figure would have seen Luann's situation and rescued her. Instead, we got someone who just spent his time scolding a bound and helpless woman.

That comes after a long and rather painful set of sight gags involving coffee and a large vacuum cleaner that were not funny. The laugh track seems to emphasize how unfunny the whole section was. 

The Gentleman Bandit has at least one positive. That is Marian Mercer as Maureen Duffy. She plays things straight, which does not make it funny but at least makes it well-acted. Even as Duffy is at the video game machine and initially takes Ace's offer of a "Hawaiian Surprise" as a lurid suggestion, Mercer never plays things broad. The "Hawaiian Surprise", for the record, is a drink that Duffy herself had ordered. 

An element that was missing was Joe Regalbuto's Toomey. As his character was sick, he was not a major part of The Gentleman Bandit. When he was, something was off in his performance. He has been naive and innocent for most of Ace Crawford, Private Eye. This time, he was just a moron. When Ace Crawford, in full drag, attempts to convince the arresting officers who he is, Ace tells Toomey to tell them who he is. Toomey decides to keep to the cover story of Ace being "Ace Sinella", his wife. He even tells "Ace Sinella" that he'll watch the kids and take them to visit "her" in jail. 

Toomey might be dumb, but not this dumb. Perhaps the cold medication, which prevented him from hearing the barking toy dog that was meant to signal Ace in danger, made him loopy. Perhaps he was put off by Ace's insistence that Toomey kiss his "wife". That was a strange situation when Ace kept pushing to be kissed on the lips. Toomey, both because he is married and has a cold, balked at the suggestion. When he finally gives Ace a peck on the cheek, Ace seems put off by that, wondering if that was it.

It was all rather odd.

It was also not funny. I found The Gentleman Bandit a bit cruel on many levels. I found it cruel against women. I found it cruel in terms of how Ace was with others. 

The Gentleman Bandit is the final Ace Crawford, Private Eye episode. It did not end fast enough. In fact, it was kind of a drag.

1/10

Next: The Complete Series